Puppy School? More like Puppy Boot Camp...

We're in puppy school.
And it's brutal.


I'm not kidding.


You know how people say that when someone joins the military, and they go to basic training, the role of the drill Sergeant is to break down the recruits to them build them back up again?


Apparently we signed up for puppy boot camp rather than puppy school.  
And the "break them down and build them up" part?  That's not for the dogs.  It's for the owners.  This week I was on the floor with the dog (only one person is allowed to work with the dog at a time) and was told the following:


"Stop petting your dog!" (she told us last week to praise with a pat to the head.  Now, we aren't allowed?)
"You're holding your leash too tight!" (guilty...stupid choke chain)
"Stop walking with your dog!" (she was laying down and we're told not to "pull them up" so I walked a few steps)
And when I had a question about holding our leash, she mocked me without hearing my question.


The funny thing is...she's REALLY GOOD at getting dogs to do what they are supposed to do.  We've seen her correct dogs pulling on the leash in less than 90 seconds.  Dogs listen to her, which we need to learn from.  We knew going into this that she was an old bird (she's almost 70) and didn't mess around.   


But.


I can't help but wonder if this is the best way for ME to learn.  In this situation, I'm visual--see, practice, repeat.  I want her to tell me when I'm not doing something right so I don't lead Maggie with bad habits.  But scolding me and mocking me makes me shut down.   


The next few weeks the Big Guy will be the primary handler due to my work schedule...which is good because I'm this close to telling the old bird where she can stick her choke chain and 6 foot leash.

Where have all the comments gone....

....I turned them off.  That's where they went. 

I've shared this before....I didn't start blogging with the hope of making it big.  I knew pretty early on that blogging about the fact that my husband can't fold sheets, or that my cat is a freak, or that my dog thinks her water dish is a frisbee would not earn me fame and fortune.

But I've noticed a trend over the last few months.
I'm crazy-stalking my stats page to see if comments had been posted. 

It started out simple enough.  I had down-time at work.  Down-time resulted in "I wonder if anyone posted a comment".  Which resulted in, "It's been an hour.  I wonder if anyone has posted anything yet?"  Which then resulted in me thinking, "Maybe it's the blog post.  Maybe its not good enough.  I need a BETTER blog post!"  But when the fun posts I like to create didn't feel like they were good enough, I would stop blogging all together.

Stupid, huh?

I know people read this blog.  The number of comments is not proportional to the number of readers.  I've read lots of blogs and never leave a comment.  But it took this crazy self-blog-stalking to realize that it's OK to turn off the comments and blog about the random stuff that make me smile and laugh.  I want to write fun posts, not get caught up in the comments.

So, I'm having my own intervention.
Comments are being shut off.

If you really want to connect with me--I'm on twitter.
Though I mostly only write to celebrities and the Chobani Yogurt people.

This has to STOP....

Back in March when I was on my way back from a work trip from Chicago, I had dinner with Julie and her family.  I got to their house and before we loaded up in the car to leave, I noticed this on their kitchen counter:

I joked and said, "New lunch box for Little Miss L?"

Julie said, "No, that's Micah's." (her husband)

When Micah came down to the kitchen so we could leave I said, "Nice retro lunch box, Micah-san!"  To which Micah said to me, "Oh.  I love the Karate Kid!  And don't even get me started on the remake with Will Smith's kid.  I have boycotted that movie."

I sat there wide eyed.

I exclaimed, "ME TOO!!!"

I just couldn't watch the remake.  The memories from 7th grade, going to see that movie in the theatre full of other 7th graders, cheering and clapping when he kicked the snot out of Johnny with the crane technique.  I'm sorry.  But nothing can replace Karate Kid.

But this has become an epidemic, people.

First...it was the Karate Kid.

Next...Footloose. 

My first cassette tape that I ever bought was the Footloose Soundtrack.  And believe it or not, I can play the 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon game using myself.  Really.  I don't talk about this, but I do have a friend who's immediate family includes an A list movie star.

Just sayin'.

And now there are movies popping up left and right that are slated for a remake. 

Did you hear that Steel Magnolia's is next? 

Yes it is. 

So, I thought I'd give my list of movies, from my junior high & high school years, that should never, ever, ever be remade.

Top Gun:

I'm sorry, say what you want about Tom Cruise, I love him still.  And no matter how hard you try to remake that volleyball scene, it just won't be the same.  I have to admit that I bought a fake leather jacket with the patches on it to match his Top Gun jacket. 

Goonies:

No. No. No. No.  Don't do it.  Sean Astin was probably one of my first crushes and I had his pictures in my room from Bop magazine and Tiger Beat.  When this movie came out, oh my word....I watched it over and over again.  And yes.  I now own the DVD.  Thankyouverymuch.

Sixteen Candles:

Long Duck Dong.  Farmer Ted. 

Enough Said.

Oh, and my favorite line, "She at the church, she getta mar-ed to oily bo-hunk."

Farris Buhler's Day Off:

"I asked for a car, and I got a computer." 

"You're Abe Froman?  The Sausage King of Chicago." 

"My best friend's, sister's, boyfriend's, brother's, girlfriend, who heard from this guy, who knows this kid, who's going with a girl saw Ferris pass out at 31 flavors last night.  I guess it's pretty serious."

Who could remake this movie to this level?  No one. 

What about you?

What movies do you put your foot down regarding a remake?

Week 12 with Maggie....

To read Maggie's story, click here

Getting into the crate is a no-brainer.
Thinking the couch is hers and hers alone.
Chasing barn cats.
Chasing Charlie.
RUNNING when she's off the leash.
Getting her to come to you with treats because "come here!" doesn't work.
No more puppy teeth.
Snoring.
Weighing close to 30 pounds.
Chasing the Frisbee (I think we have a "fly ball" dog!)
Thinking her outside water dish is a frisbee.

Nipping.
Small tears in clothes as she reaches for the frisbee.
Only 2 pee-in-the-house accidents this month!
(one of which was on her pillow? huh?)
One bag of dog food a month.
Puppy school next week (AMEN)
Walks around the farm.
Puppy kisses.
Sleeping through the night.
Looking at photos and thinking, "WOW.  She was so little!"

Looking at her sit in the kitchen thinking, "crap...she's BIG!"

Check out other "fur kid" stories at Kelly's Korner!

Someone is off to Puppy School....

Which is good because clearly she's mistaken her bowl for a frisbee.