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Friday, June 19, 2009

My Name is Kelley and I'm a Food Freak...
I've written about it before, and I'll write about it again.

I'm a food freak.

Expiration dates/sell by dates/best by dates are all the same to me. To me they mean, "do not under any circumstances consume this after the date." While I don't think I'll die, it still is gross.

Sorry. But it is.

Imagine if you will, however, that on Sunday I decided that the 4 bananas I had on the counter that were brown and spotty needed to be used for banana bread. I could slice it up and take it with me to work each day and have a little banana bread goodness each morning.

I made the bread and it was lovely.
That was until I ate mold.

Uh huh. Yep. I did.

See, it's been a little warm here the last few days. Minnesota is known for the humidity, you see. We've had the A/C on, but it was still a little on the humid side.

When I made the bread on Sunday, I sliced it up and put it in baggies. Which I left on the counter. I've been eating on that damn bread all week. A slice in the morning. A slice in the evening. I figure I was doing my colon some good because of the flax seed I put in the bread.

Yesterday, though, I didn't feel great. I wasn't ill. But I just didn't feel good. I thought, "....its the flax seed." Yep, you got that right!

This morning, I get to the bus stop early and I decide to eat my slice of bread before boarding the bus. Took a bite. Took a second bite, and when I went to take a 3rd I stopped. On my brown bread was a tiny white spot.

"What is that?" I thought. "Is it flour?" No. Flour isn't furry.

It was mold, my friends.
On my banana bread.

Apparently moist bread, in a closed baggie, on a kitchen counter in a slightly humid kitchen is the perfect breeding ground for my own antibiotics factory.

The remaining piece (yes. Only one was left!) was tossed by the Big Guy when he got home and read my facebook post. Though my friend JP commented on that facebook post and said that if it was in the form of a religious symbol (the Virgin Mary, Jesus, Apostle Paul...), I'd be in for some big money. Sadly, nothing of the sort. Just a tiny, white, spot.

That sound you hear? That's my mother laughing and saying "She didn't get her freakish food nature from me!"

12 comments:

Tracy Griffin - Artist said...

I think you should have let the white spot grow. You never know which of the apostles or NKOTB's face might appear after a week or so!

Remember - you ARE still trying to raise money for the walk! :)

Dorkys Ramos said...

Haha, it's funny and so disgusting at the same time. I'm sorry! The same kinda happened to me, only it was with an apple. I was so grossed out I was spitting into my garbage can at work for a long time!

Jason, as himself said...

Yucky. But at least you didn't take a big gulp of sour milk. THAT is the worst.

meandtheblueskies said...

A little mold won't kill you. After all, do you have any idea what cheese really is? Hmmmm? Anyway, stopping by from SITS. If you get a chance, stop by my blog and enter my one year anniversary contest.

Caren said...

LOL...that was great...but gross. Mold on food is so nasty. Of course in my house (which I so sweetly refer to as testosterone valley)... we never have enough food left to get moldy.

Tammy said...

I'm the same way. Hi from the SITStahood.

Melissa B. said...

Stopping by from SITS to Share Some Sunday Comment Love...AND the chance at a $50 Target Gift Card!

!!The Obnoxious SAHM!! said...

Just stopping by to show some love! :)

AB HOME INTERIORS said...

Haha. You sound just like my husband. Once bread has been in the pantry for more than two days he will no longer eat it. Little does he know I put sour milk in the pancake mix. A trick my mama taught me. No one ever gets sick and they LOVE my secret pancakes.

The Daily Dean Chronicals said...

OMG! You have your own pharmacy brewing at your house! Ha hahahah Thanks for the laugh! My hubby is such a food freak that he checks expiration dates religously! He even has the girls doing it! Bottle that mold and you could have something there! Ha ha Happy Sunday!

Future Mama said...

Ummm... Don't worry, I'm a food freak too! At least you look good!! Holy cow!

hulagirlatheart said...

Ha! Hand to God, last night I was making sandwiches and found a little mold on our bread. I tore off the two moldy parts and proceeded to make the sandwiches. I like to live on the edge.